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Parenting includes taking necessary actions and making judgment calls in the best interest of the child. Let us take a father having to accompany his daughter to a public restroom. Which one should he take her to, the men’s or the women’s, and how does he determine which one is the right restroom to take her to? On a number of occasions, my observing eyes have seen men walking into the men’s restroom with little girls. Apart from hoping the man is actually her father or some trusted, close relative, the sight keeps evoking the question: “Is he taking her to the right restroom?”
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Let us explore the underlying issues to see whether this practice is socially and morally, and even legally acceptable, and if not, what course of action should be taken in these circumstances.
Young children need to be accompanied to public restrooms to ensure they are protected and safe from pedophiles and kidnappers, or any person who targets children to do them harm.
Nothing should bar a father from accompanying his little girl to the restroom, public or private, except he is a pedophile and/or cannot be trusted. The same principle applies to any male relative or friend of the child or child’s family. In fact, where it can be avoided, the mother or a female should accompany the child to the restroom, though in all fairness we have to agree that women too have harmed children. But it is perhaps more than three times less likely for a female to harm the child than it is for a male to do so. This is obvious due to the male female attraction, and mind you, fathers and daughters are not exempted from this kind of erotic, but taboo, physical attraction. This somewhat often innocent sexual attraction is explained as an Electra complex. Psychologists may tell you that the existence of the Electra complex and the Oedipus complex , as in the case of mother-son attraction, are the roots of incestuous relations between parents and children, where they occur.
Nothing should bar a father from accompanying his little girl to the restroom, public or private, except he is a pedophile and/or cannot be trusted. The same principle applies to any male relative or friend of the child or child’s family. In fact, where it can be avoided, the mother or a female should accompany the child to the restroom, though in all fairness we have to agree that women too have harmed children. But it is perhaps more than three times less likely for a female to harm the child than it is for a male to do so. This is obvious due to the male female attraction, and mind you, fathers and daughters are not exempted from this kind of erotic, but taboo, physical attraction. This somewhat often innocent sexual attraction is explained as an Electra complex. Psychologists may tell you that the existence of the Electra complex and the Oedipus complex , as in the case of mother-son attraction, are the roots of incestuous relations between parents and children, where they occur.
In terms of the legality of the practice, we have to ask the broad question, i.e., “Is it illegal for persons to enter restrooms designed to accommodate the opposite sex?” This would be kind of tricky to answer especially since each state may have its own laws pertaining to the issue. You might however have seen a two-in-one public restroom, where either a man or a woman is free to enter and use.
Barring this, at the end of the day, when it comes to who should take little girls to the restroom and which restroom should be used, it comes down to what is the more, natural and socially acceptable practice. However, the greater underlying issue is, even if it is okay for a father or male relative to accompany a young girl to the restroom, taking her to the male restroom presents a problem, the same way taking her to the female restroom will. If the child is taken to the male restroom (we all know how these restrooms are generally set up usually allowing men to pee openly) there is a high risk that she may see all kinds of male genitals, which she ought not to be exposed to as a child.
On the flip side, the father or male relative may get into trouble with the law if he walks into the female restroom, albeit he is simply accompanying his little girl. Women are more concerned with violation of their privacy in this regard more than men might be. This doesn’t suggest that it is more okay for a female to enter and use the male restroom, whether it is an adult female or child female.
It might be reasonable to hold that despite it is socially or legally unacceptable for a male to use the female restroom or vice versa, the exception should be where a parent of the opposite sex needs to accompany a young child, girl or boy, to the restroom of their respective gender. This is a matter for public policy and public health and safety considerations.
Again, parenting includes taking necessary action and making judgment calls in the best interest of the child. Where there may be no expressed rules or laws prohibiting or sanctioning cross-gender use of public restrooms, the onus in on parents to think it through and make the best possible decision in the interest of the child.
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Do you think it’s improper for a father/male guardian to take a daughter to a public male restroom? What about if he takes her to the public female restroom?
Feel free to leave your comment below.
It's much more proper for a father to take a daughter into a male restroom than for the father to take the daughter into the female one.
ReplyDeleteEither way someone ends up being in the wrong restroom but it's just a little girl in the men's over a full grown adult male in the women's. Beside's he can cover his daughter's eyes if he thinks she might be exposed to something.
"It might be reasonable to hold that despite it is socially or legally unacceptable for a male to use the female restroom or vice versa, the exception should be where a parent of the opposite sex needs to accompany a young child, girl or boy, to the restroom of "THEIR" respective gender."
ReplyDeleteDo you mean the child's or adult's gender? Because I've never seen an adult take a small child into the restroom of the child's gender. People seem to be far less bothered, if at all, by the child being in the opposite restroom rather than the adult.