Achieving Happiness and Living the Good Life

By D. Cummings

Inspired by Repacking Your Bags: How to Live With a New Sense of Purpose by Leider and Shapiro, 1995

Have you ever tried to figure out what really it means to be happy, and what is the sum total of it? What about "what does it feel like to be happy?" A bit of redundancy here already? Well, in some ways achieving happiness and the good life does require you to practice redundancy but not to the point of "insanity" where you're doing the same thing over and over though expecting a different result. You'll come to understand what I'm referring to when I discuss the unpacking and repacking process. In short, HAPPINESS = living in the place you belong, with the people you love, doing the right work, on purpose.

A life without purpose is no life at all, really. And purpose is essentially a sum total of your talents, passion and environment times your vision. (Talents + Passion + Environment) x Vision. For most of us, perhaps except for those who have already repacked their bags, and continue to do so at necessitated intervals, living the good life, that all-emcompassing prosperous life, would require some introspection, retrospection, admissions (not being in denial) strategising, and changes, major changes.

In effect, in order to live and enjoy the good life, a life tainted with happiness and the simplicities of happiness, we would have to unpack and repack our bags, and do so with a renewed sense of purpose. Then and only then will we be able to yank ourselves out of the burdens of the present and of the past and therefore lighten our load for our future endeavours. This said unpacking and repacking exercise we will be called upon to do throughout our lives as we consistently invoke the repacking principle at various junctures and crossroads

UNPACKING?

Unpacking can take various forms, but at the end of the day it surrounds changes, letting go, restructuring, and reassumptions pertaining to the place you live, the people you love, your work, and your purpose, whether it be your general purpose or a given purpose at a certain period of your life.

You might well be aware of people, including celebrities who engage in a tell-all, e.g., in an autobiographic recount (book, documentary,movie, etc) documenting their past. Hurts and pains, joys and laughters, tears, opportunities and mistakes...pretty much everything. "I'm gay." "I'm a lesbian." "I've cheated on my spouse." "I have a love child." Or confessions about committing this or that sin or crime or immorality. The list can be non-exhaustive. I guess this is what we call "airing your dirty laundry." I have to say, and you may agree, that it takes a lot of character, and guts, to expose one's ass out there like that.

Notwithstanding, this example is one of the more major forms of unpacking (as opposed to unpacking in private) since it exposes one's self to public scrutiny and public scorn, possibly public condemnation based on what is revealed in the unpacking process. Big a risk as it is and considering you could 'shoot yourself in the foot', possibly self-destroy your reputation, I'm almost certain that this consideration is forefront before publication of the the information. However, when the need to unpack your baggages become exceedingly overwhelming, unpacking before public eye tend to become secondary to saving one's reputation.

Many people who unpacked in public like that have testified of how "light" and unburdened they feel to go on and live their lives. Do you think you have the heart for that? Think about it. Would you survive public scrutiny? How would you go about unpacking those skeletons in your closet? What would it require? Can you fully unpack or would you reserve some things? Until you fully unpack, whether all at once, or gradually, whether in public or in private, you will not be able to truly enjoy the good life.

Incidentally though the courage to unpack and repack our bags is usually hindered a great deal by our personal values, which often times is shaped by the traditions and culture in in which we were reared. For example, "Our culture has traditionally taught us that shouldering the same load no matter what the circumstances is more honorable than unpacking our bags and letting go. We hang in there because we are conditioned to believe that we are failures if our relationships or jobs end. In fact, it may just be the opposite. Making that discovery is what repacking is all about." (Unpacking Your Bags; Leider and Shapiro)

And the good life, might I point out, is far from "the perfect life," for there's no such thing though living in the place you belong, with the people you love, doing the right work, on purpose may be the closest you can get to the "perfect" life. The good life offers joys and satisfaction even if you're not filthy rich!

PLACE: Where do I belong?

Place speaks of the appropriate physical location. Have you ever considered that each one of us was meant to belong in a particular place? And belonging in a specific place is not necessarily constant. As reasons and seasons change the place we belong may change in order to enable us to embark on or adapt to new dispositions in life. Disposal of the former location for the new one.

An essential question is, how does one determine the place he or she belongs? It is natural to assume that you're in the right place if the people you love and care for, and they you, are living with you or close enough. Those are the people that add value to your life. Sometimes these people may not be living in your house or street but are in close proximity or are easily accessible.

LOVE: Who are the people you love?

This factor is pretty much self-explanatory. But these are the people, e.g., family members, who make your daily life worth living and are worth all the sacrifices you make to maintain those relationships. Needless to say, the love spoken of here extends to people who are also not related by blood, for example, your neighbors, friends, colleagues...pretty much people who you have common interests and deeply connected bonds with.

WORK: What is the right work?

Doing the right work consists of being occupied in a vocation that you chose and not one that chose you. It is also one that reflects your talent, passions, values, and vision. Equally essential is the environment in which you feel most comfortable using your talents to demonstrate your passion. When environment complements our values, passion, talents, it reinforces that feeling of doing the right job. The right job of course is not 'the perfect job.' " When we talk to those who are energized by their work, and who are truly enjoying it, we notice they are not in "perfect jobs." But, they are in situations that they have chosen freely."

More recognizably, "The perfect job isn't a standard of living. It's a state of mind and a state of being. In the perfect job, you're applying the talents you enjoy most to an interest you're passionate about, in an environment that fit who you are and what you value."

PURPOSE: What is your purpose?

Incidentally, doing the right work is linked to your purpose and this serves to make achieving the good life much easier and simpler. In living a purpose driven purposeful life you are engaging your talents, passion, and vision in a conducive environment in order to yield that utter personal satisfaction of living and being alive. At the same time, and perhaps equally important, you are helping others and advancing your community.

So are you ready to unpack and repack and start living the good life? Or are you still waiting until you have all your ducks in a row?

Remember there is no perfect time to start living the good life. Just grab the opportunity when your soul is begging you. That time might be right now.

Find a friend, call up a confidante and offload. Make decisions, end bad relationships, throw away unused things, and people. Do your inventory and narrow your life to a point of substance. Everything else that you can live without you throw out. Discard even to relationships and non-item things if you must. In this long and trying journey of life you don't need the extra unnecessary baggages.

Begin the good life. It's going to be a lifelong process of inventorizing your life but it's worth it. You will continue to adjust and adapt in the areas of the place you live, the people you love, your work, and your purpose to suit your current needs at the time. In other words you continuously reshape and refine your good life making it better one chapter at a time. Live your good life today!

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